This week The Iona Institute launched a new report called Marriage Breakdown and Family Structure in Ireland. The headline figure is that divorce and separation in Ireland has risen sixfold since 1968. As at Census 2011, almost 250,000 Irish adults were separated or divorced.

I appeared on a number of shows to discuss the report as did Professor Patricia Casey. It’s a pity we didn’t know at the time about a programme that was broadcast in BBC2 last night called ‘Mum and Dad Are Splitting Up’.

The programme interviewed young adults whose parents had divorced. The separated parents were also interviewed. The pain of the young adults whose parents had split up was readily apparent and a lot of their anger was directed at the parent they blamed for the breakup of their family. They didn’t want to hear the excuse of the parent that they were no longer in love.

I debated our report on a number of the shows and several times there was a point blank refusal to acknowledge how serious a problem growing family breakdown presents and how bad it is for children. There was only a concern to minimise the damage to all concerned after a breakup occurred, but there was no real concern I could detect to prevent all these breakups occurring in the first place.

Marriage breakup was instead presented fatalistically as something we have no control over, like the weather. It was also assumed all those broken marriages had been desperately unhappy and that it was better for the children if their parents went their separate ways.

In fact, according to US studies, most marriages that end in divorce are low-conflict and children can cope perfectly well in low-conflict marriages. Low conflict means the parents aren’t violent and and/or constantly shouting at one another.

There was also a refusal to acknowledge that, all other things being equal, it is desirable for children to live with their mother and father under the same roof (assuming the parents are fit parents) or that we should strive towards the goal of ensuring that as many children as possible grow up in this environment.

It is a sign of real trouble when a society can no longer agree that the marriage is something that is worthy of special support and that children deserve the love of their own mother and father living under the same roof.

Meanwhile, here is a feature from the Daily Mail discussing the aforementioned BBC documentary.